Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Happy Thanksgiving!


May your stuffing be tasty may your turkey plump, may your potatoes and gravy have never a lump.
May your yams be delicious and your pies take the prize, and may your thanksgiving dinner stay off your thighs!

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Saying Goodbye to an Old Friend- Thanks to Suicide.

I am shocked to get the call that you are gone. I can't believe my old friend, a woman so young could depart this world with so much left to do and share and give. How could this be. So sad, so terribly sad.
As shocked as I was to get that call, it doesn't come close, not even close to how terribly stunned to hear how you left us. How could you do it? What was going through your mind? Your heart? What about your kids? What about your friends? Your family? What happened? How could this happen? So confused, angry, sad, so terribly stunned and sad. Surely this can't be true. Not you. No way not you!
You were the girl so strong and stubborn who would stay on this earth forever to spite everyone who got in your way or pissed you off. You were the girl with the most beautiful smile that lit up any room you entered and the best sense of humor that could make anyone and everyone laugh. You were the girl who always told everyone exactly how you felt, no holds barred, feelings be damned. You were the girl who never let anyone live anything down. You were the girl so intelligent you could do anything you wanted to.
Although I suppose I haven't known you so well lately. We have lost touch over the years. Maybe you aren't the girl I knew back then. Surely that girl was still there though, somewhere, just hidden maybe. Hiding behind the sadness, the gloom, the lonliness, the desperation or maybe just the desire for it all to end. You have such beautiful children and more friends than I can count. Yet still you chose to leave them, us, your future. Why? A question I will always have and will always ponder. I wish I could have held your hand, given you a hug, or given you whatever you needed to know it would all be ok. I'm sorry I couldn't give you that. I'm sorry you wanted it all to end. I'm sorry you couldn't stay to share your big beautiful smile with the world just a little while longer, or maybe forever. I am sorry you are gone. I will miss you dearly and cherish the many memories I have of us "girls". How much fun we had, the trouble we got into, the friendship. I will always be grateful for knowing you. Goodbye my old friend, so sad to say goodbye, especialy when it's thanks to suicide.